Why Job Hunting is Like Dating

Just finished a week's worth of job hunting and interviewing (the job hunting has been going on since mid-December, but the interviewing has all been this week due to the holidays), and realized just how much job hunting and interviewing is like dating.

Job Hunting

First, you have to find something you're actually interested in. This entails signing up for various online job boards (aka dating sites); looking through job listing after job listing (profiles); and swiping left or right in a sense after reading through the job listing and seeing if it is right for you. Sometimes, you can tell at a glance if it's not, especially if they list the salary they're looking pay. Oh, lord. Can't tell you the amount of times I've thought a job was just up my alley, until I see the salary at the bottom. Yeah, I'm not taking a job for $20-$30K LESS than what I'm used to making. Sorry, Charlie.

If it all actually sounds like something I'd be interested in and would be good at, I "swipe right" by sending in my resume and cover letter, which has been personalized for that company and the listing itself. Then, I sit and wait to see if they'll "swipe left" by not replying at all or sending back the dreaded "We're not interested at this time" mass email. Boo on those, by the way. How do they know they're not interested without even meeting me? Or they also "swipe right" by setting up a time for a phone interview or going straight to an in-person interview.

Interviews

Holy hell, this has seriously been like a ton of first dates one after the other. Here's why:

• I get all dressed up to show them me at my best. 
• I put on my pheromones -- Gives that little extra "You will love me because I'm awesome and you'll find yourself attracted to me (in a totally job-friendly, not dating, way)". If you don't have any pheromones and you're job hunting or dating, contact me, by the way. ;) 
• I meet each person and wonder if I could see myself actually working with them on a daily basis, while they're thinking the same thing
• We're both looking to see if it's a good fit

Of course, there's also apparently a new thing I didn't know about before now. I was asked on a phone interview to participate in a group interview. Okay, at first that sounded like I'd be meeting with a group of people from the company at one time. Sure. NO. It's not that. This is me and a bunch of other candidates for the same job meeting with two to three people from the company all at the same time. 

Umm, yikes. I've seen this before on "The Bachelor" and that doesn't go well. No group dates. Just no. Job Hunting: The Hunger Games doesn't sound appealing. Needless to say, I passed on that one. The job didn't seem like a good fit after the phone interview anyway. 

Ghosting

Oh, ghosting. I am so glad this was not around (or if it was, I didn't know about it) back when I was dating. You meet someone; you date them either once or a few times; and then poof, they're gone. Now if they actually died, that's a whole different thing. Can't fault them for that. But this is when one day they're in contact with you and you think things are fine, and then the next day, blammo, zero contact from then on, leaving you to wonder what the eff just happened. 

Has this happened to me in job hunting? Unfortunately yes. I don't recommend it. ;) I was contacted by a company about 6 months ago (yes, I was job hunting then, too -- thanks, company layoffs...) because they were interested in me from my LinkedIn profile. I had a phone interview with the recruiter. Went great. Had a phone interview with someone who I thought would be the hiring manager but wasn't (still figuring that one out) and that went great. Had an in-person interview and met with 5 different people that day. Went great. They asked me back for a second in-person to meet with 3 other people and the hiring manager and recruiter again. Fine by me. That all went great, minus with one guy who I'd be working with who had just started there. He asked some odd questions that threw me. I sent the usual follow-up thank you emails, and nada. Absolute zippo for communication after that. Still not sure what happened there. In a karmic twist, that job is now open again (not applying for it at all) and the job of the guy who had just started there is also open again. Wow. Probably for the best that they ghosted me, but here's my advice. Do not ghost people. Not interested? Tell them. Be honest. Be transparent. Be open.